How to Get Into a Certain House
by bliss4me
Summary: Have you wondered what you have to do to be accepted to a certain house at Hogwarts? Well lets find out!


Hello there! Luna Lovegood here! I am the new writer for The Hogwarts Newspaper. For today's entertainment I asked all houses to come up with 10 things together in order to become a house member. For example, if you no longer want to be a part of the house you are in then you are in luck! Why? Follow these simple 10 rules from each house, and maybe you will find your new house to belong in.

Thank you Ms. Chang, Ms. Patil, and Mr. Corner for doing this: Yes, I know why Ravenclaw first! But you see I am in Ravenclaw and well I am loyal to them. Here are the things you need to do in order to become a Ravenclaw house member.

You have to have the itching to learn

You have to study

NO GOSSIP unless it has to do with Potter or the Snakes erm Slytherin

Need to carry on a civil and intellectual conversation

No pointless books like romance, fantasy, sci-fi, or horror. Reading Historical books, science, biographies are a must. Well, if you are a muggleborn we will make an assumption for you. After all you grew up reading that crap, and it probably is the closest thing to home for you. Otherwise, half-bloods and purebloods you will not have that crap in your hands

Wear blue!

Know your house founder back to back

Get to know the house ghost

Always think ahead

NEED GOOD GRADES! NO P NO T NO D! E IS THE LOWEST YOU CAN GET!

Awww I am so happy to be a Ravenclaw! I don't think I will ever change. Now moving on lets go to Hufflepuff!

Thank you Ms. Abbott, Ms. Bones, Mr. Finch-Fletchley, and Mr. Smith for helping me today: If you are considering joining Hufflepuff these are the 10 things you need to do.

Be nice

Love your friends and family

Be LOYAL

Have to have an urge to help others

Before bed you need to kiss and rub the head of the statue of Cedric Diggory for luck

If you don't get an O in herbology you might as well just leave!

Forgive your enemies, never forget them, and stay clear away from them!

Wear YELLOW!

SUPPORT HARRY POTTER!

AND NO DRAMA!

Hmmm I don't know about the whole statue idea. I mean why luck? He is gone after all. I love you and miss you Cedric! Right… now let's stay on track. Gryffindor is up! Do this and you will for sure be in Gryffindor!

You need to say the Potter secret oath

Wear scarlet

Protect the trio (thought of by Neville, Ginny, Dean, and Seamus)

Join the D.A. it is a must!

Adventure is fun! Who cares what professors say. Therefore you must sneak out at night at least once

Never befriend a slytherin. Unless she is hot and actually nice. Maybe a him too, and no Malfoy we are not talking about you.

Always stick with your friends and family

Accept the fact that you may have to fight! And don't be afraid of death

Like quiditch or at least attempt to like the sport

And ABSALOUTELY, POSITIVELY, EVEN IF THEY ARE UNDER VERITASERM, WE WILL NOT ACCEPT A SLYTHERIN INTO OUR HOUSE!

Wow thank you Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, Ms. Weasley, Ms. Granger, Ms. Brown, Mr. Longbottom, Mr. Thomas, and Mr. Finnagen for your input. Harry also wanted me to make sure everyone know that the other twats who put number 1 were not his idea. In fact, he hated it, and because Ron thinks he is funny decided to change it when he was not looking. Good luck Ron you know how modest Harry can be.

And last but not least the Slytherins! Thank you Mr. Malfoy, Ms. Parkinson, and Mr. Zabini for your helpful input: To be a Slytherin this is what you need to do.

MUST be pureblood…DUH!

MUST become a death eater….DUH!

MUST follow Voldemort… come on now! And write an essay why he is the most and best powerful wizard of all time

MUST write 10 things why you hate Potter

MUST write 10 things you want to do to the golden trio

NO SIGN OF WEAKNESS

You need to make 3 kids cry from each house. Total of 9 kids!

Need to give snape royal treatment

WEAR BLACK, GREEN, SILVER, ONLY. PURPLE AND GRAY IS AN ASSUMPTION. IF WE SEE ANY PINK OR ORANGE YELLOW ANYTHING WE WILL KICK YOU OUT!

Stay true to the pureblood status!  
>… Thanks I guess. Well I have been told by Snape that I am stupid and worthless, and there is no point in writing this because you are stuck in the house that you were sorted in oops. And please forgive me guys. He took 10 points from Ravenclaw.<p> 


End file.
